Thursday, March 7, 2013

I knew you were trouble when you walked in.

We were strangers when we met, and we were strangers when you left. I've wanted you for so long that I couldn't comprehend that you were finally mine. It felt too much like a dream, and we all have to wake up sometime. I'd throw it all away for you. If you took another look you'd be back so soon. Right beside you, a dark cold night. Wrapped around, you better hold on tight. Sometimes, feeling pain is a good thing because it shows you that people can hurt you. But most of all, it reminds you how lucky you are to have those who won't ever dare treat you that way. It's true that happiness is achieved when we appreciate everything we have, it's just that people can never be content of what they have. They always long for something that's not yet theirs. No matter how many times I get hurt because of you, I won't leave you. Because even if I have a hundred reasons to leave you, I'll look for that one reason to fight for you. To forget somebody isn't possible. Deep inside, you remember everything. You may not think of them for years at a time, but you don't know how to forget. You can recall the way they smiled when they were happy, and the way their face showed no expression when they couldn't find their way. Someday, someone's gonna come along and put the pieces of my heart back together. I'm just worried about that one little piece they're never gonna be able to find. One that makes the puzzle complete. The one you took the day you walked away. At this age, the worst thing you can do to yourself is fall for someone harder than they fell for you. 'Forgive and forget,' that's what they say. It's good advice, but it's not very practical. When someone hurts us, we want to hurt them back; when someone wrongs us, we want to be right. Without forgiveness, old scores are never settled, old wounds never heal, and the most we can hope for is one day we'll be lucky enough to forget. I don't believe you get over someone when you break up. I think you get over them after you've watched them move on. It's a complicated world. People have a hard time finding each other and even when they do, they're scared to take the risk. Sometimes when you hold out for everything, you walk away with nothing. If you are going to talk, let it mean something. People talk and spread lies or rumors, just to see who's miserable enough to listen. All you end up saying is a lot of nothing to no one. You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time. You tend to give more than take in relationships. You need your space and privacy. You don't like to be smothered. You're secretly hoping your partner will change for you. You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard. I don't get attached. I don't want a relationship unless you can prove to me you're not all the same. No, your words don't mean crap to me. No, I don't trust you. No, I don't believe you. Promises are nothing but empty words to me. I know I'm not your one and only so don't tell me I am. No, my smile doesn't make your day. No, my laughter isn't music to your ears. No, I'm not too good to be true so start with the truth. If I'm what you want, tell me why and tell me often. Tell me you love me, but only if you mean it. It's not right. To put so much effort, so much heart into a relationship but getting nothing in return. To give, to give your all in every way possible but be let down, over and over again. It's not fair. You are only as good as the love you have for other people. Difficult times have helped me to understand better than before, how infinitely rich and beautiful life is in every way, and that so many things that one goes worrying about are of no importance whatsoever. I'm so scared that I'll want to love you forever and you'll only want me for a few moments in your life. Everybody has difficult years, but a lot of times those difficult years end up being the greatest years of your life, if you survive them. Even when your heart is breaking, you should smile. And some may think that it's bad to hide your feelings, but I think that pain should only be felt for a short amount of time. Happiness should out number it every day, every way. You must never compare yourself to anyone, except from the previous you.